life goes on.

my mom told me the other day to stop stressing so much.  ha.  toni is so funny sometimes.  i asked her how i could not stress when this year has brought not one, but two failed relationships and a court case brought on by a women who kidnapped my dad and married him.  my life has quickly become a punch.line to multiple jokes that you never want to hear.  

to fill you in.  mike turned out to be manipulative, immature and verbally abusive.  so needless to say i walked away and started the longest break up in history lasting a total of 6 weeks.  it finally came to an end when he returned my spare car key, watched a movie and denying his every attempt of a kiss.  ya'll should be very proud of that fact that i stuck to my guns and finally 'kicked' him out of my house to sit on the couch alone in the darkness numb for about 20 minutes.  only to be a little bummed the next day when he didn't text me.  this love crap is a sick and twisted cycle.  i don't get it.  

anyway i'm not as bummed as this post is about to make me sound...so here are some pics to keep your attention.  thanks lovelies.

me and sadie lady at some family function this summer

zoo time for my b.day

 i was a really good shoulder ride giver

more proof of my shoulder ride skills

 we were a little too excited for the train ride at the zoo

 another random family function

 me and my lovely cousin tilly at jony's bridal shower

 me and jony at her shower...she is a gem

 da boys

 they 'helped' me clean my bathroom 

 at the centerville fireworks withe rae rae

 me and millie on the 4th of july

 don't worry she was ok...this was hilarious

 made my dad a plate of fruit

 caught the bouquet at jony's wedding

 sadie was FREAKED out for this ride...immediately after she informed me that she didn't cry

 pioneer village tour with the fam on our annual asay lagoon day

 jake was informing me on how to make coffee

 this was right after jake pushed emme out of the picture...sibling rivalry at it's best

 love these little loves

 babysitter of the year

 another zoo pic

 just discovered the most delicious cupcakes...oh and i love erika

 lots of quality time with this love

 mike tried to win me back

 emme got really comfy on our 3 hour drive

 flaming gorge or bust

 all ready for an adventure

 nature walk time

 still don't know what these are or why they are in the middle of nowhere

 homeward bound

 again babysitter of the year

 love these kids

 this guy was so hot to me.  any man who can rock this at church is a win in my book

 gas station run with my favorite 11 year old

 jack was soooo over picture time

 story time in mom and dad's bed

 so many things were funny about this.  jane is her own person and i love it

 max was thrilled to be in his bumbo

 we are the hottest nerds you will ever meet

date night by myself.  not as depressing as you would think. 

so as you can see my summer was amazing.  seriously it was fantastic.  even though mike and i broke up, we still had loads of fun together and fell in love for 2.5 seconds.  i also learned that there is still a lot of things that i need to work out in my own life before i try to take on someone else's life too.  i mean how am i supposed to care for someone else emotionally when i can't even begin to take care of myself emotionally at times?  again i'm not as bummed as this is making me sound.  i blame it on the willie nelson i am listening to right now.  the point is this.  i am a perfectly normal and sane human being who has feelings too.  feelings that i'm not as afraid to share as i used to be.  and i think that's a really good thing.  so sorry this is a long post and i am going to try to get back on track and not forget about my blog.  first order is clean my room, start running again, throw out some old clothes and shoes and pick up my heart.  i think it's buried under the mess on my floor.  ha ha, i kid, i kid.  i'm happy.  damn willie nelson and his contemplative mood control!  good night gems. 

i'm alive!! and this is a long post!

so apparently my blog doesn't update itself.  lame.

seeing as it has been forever since i last wrote i will start the long process of updating ya'll on my exciting life!  first things first...the long awaited court date post!  here we go...

we (my siblings, brother in law, dad, mom and uncle)  all got there about the same time and walked into the fourth district courthouse together.  we were greeted by my two aunts and two of my other uncles.  we said our hello's and realized that we had about 15-20 extra pairs of eyes on us.  it was like the land of misfit toys who just happened to be 'friends' of my dad and susan.  which means that susan rounded up all the crazies that she could and brought them for 'moral support' for my dad.  lame.  well our main objective for the 15 minute wait was to keep these misfits away from my dad and especially keep susan away from him so that he wouldn't get upset and have an episode and not be able to calm him down in time.  we failed horribly.  these people were relentless and kept pushing their way through our family to say hello to james.  he would smile, shake their hand and stare at them.  i was so mad.  my blood was boiling.  i was so mad that i was literally shaking.  katie was also getting really upset and decided to humiliate the misfits by asking my dad if he knew that person to which he would reply yes, so she would ask their name, to which he had no reply and would stare at the person.  katie would then ask the person to leave him alone and to walk away.  it was awesome.  finally my brother in law nate and uncle clair flanked my dad on either side to keep them away.  i happened to look over as susan was placing her hand on my dads cheek telling him that everything was going to be okay and that she was there.  i yelled to my uncle to get her away.  he turned my dad's face away from her and edged his way between her and my dad.  it was awesome.  it was at that point that the bailiff yelled for the two parties to separate until we went into the courtroom.  the misfits contested with 'we're his friends just trying to say hello'...it was ridiculous.

we finally went into the courtroom and again surrounded our dad so that she couldn't get a hold of him. now let me just clarify.  from the time that my dad last saw susan and this day he had never asked about her and would say on multiple occasions that he just wanted to find a woman.  he didn't once remember that he was married to susan.  moving on.  we all filed into our seats and court was in session.  my katie and my brother matt were seated at a table with their lawyer and susan was seated at the opposite table with her lawyer and also my dad's 'lawyer' and his assistant.  the judge started and my dad's 'lawyer' requested a brief counsel with his client.  his request was granted and on they went.  it was a brief 5 minutes or so and i wish i could have been there.  you see my dad's 'lawyer' has parkinson's and my dad has alzheimers...must have been a riveting conversation!  i'm so rude.  anyway.  the judge asked for witnesses from kate and matt's lawyer and kate went first.  she did an awesome job and got her point across with just the right amount of sass and maturity.  it was fantastic.  i was so proud of her.  then matt's turn and again he did such an awesome job!  i was also really proud of him and so grateful for the sacrifice he has made for the last 3 years living with my dad.  of course susan's lawyer cross examined and proved that he was a jerk.  my dad's 'lawyer' would ask questions and due to his ailment it took him a really long time to say things and then he would get lost in what he was saying.  it was painful to listen to him talk.  

finally it was susan's turn to testify.  i was literally on the edge of my seat to hear how she was going to testify.  i mean she was under oath and obviously she was going to tell the truth right?  well not exactly.  she went on and on about how she 'loves james dearly' and how they 'have a special relationship' with each other.  again my dad didn't mention her for 3.5 months...interesting.  she talked about my dad telling her that we all just wanted his money and that he would cry to her because we wanted to put him in an 'institution'.  and this is the real kicker for me...she brought up a conversation with me in which i supposedly 'adamantly stated that we were going to put him in an institution'.  her words felt like a slap in the face and a punch in the stomach all at the same time.  i was so upset that someone was lying about me and there was nothing i could do about it.  and lying about me in front of my family!  who did this women think that she was?  i put my head in my hands as the sting of tears filled my eyes.  my aunt buffy began to pat my back and i stewed in anger for the rest of her testimony. 

the judge called for a recess and i bolted for the door to get to the bathroom.  my aunt and i got to the bathroom and she took the last stall.  i sat and waited as a few of the misfits sauntered in.  they looked at the stalls and i said 'they're full'.  they then kept looking in all of them and i said once more, 'they're all full' through clenched teeth and they just ignored me.  i was fuming at this point.  my aunt came out and ran to the stall and locked the door, dropped my purse and broke down.  just then i heard the misfits seeing if my stall was in use...seriously crazy people just go away!  i silently cried in the bathroom for a second, composed myself and walked out with my head high.  there was obviously nothing i could do about susan telling lies about me in court.  i was just praying that the judge could see through susan's lies and this would all be over.  i sat back down and kate and matt's lawyer motioned that he wanted to talk to me.  he asked if i remembered the conversation that susan was referring to, i said yes.  he asked if what she said was true and i said no.  he nodded and sat back down at his table.  i knew i was in for it now. 

the judge called the court back to order and asked kate and matt's lawyer if he had any more witnesses to call to the stand.  sure enough he called my name.  my heart started racing and my palms got sweaty...something that never happens.  all of my many hours spent watching crime dramas were actually becoming my reality!  i was testifying in court...something i never thought i would be able to say.  i held my hand in the air and swore to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help me god.  actually i think it was more that the testimony that i was about to give was the truth.  same thing.  so kate and matt's lawyer asked me to talk about the phone conversation with susan.  what really happened was that she asked me what our plans were for our dad and i told her it was none of her business.  SHE was the one to bring up this 'institution' that she kept talking about.  i told her that they weren't called institutions, that they are assisted living facilities and that we didn't know what our immediate plans were for our dad.  so somehow in all of that she got that i 'adamantly stated that we were going to put him in an institution'.  am i crazy or are those two different things?  anyway.  then susan's lawyer gets up there and twists everything that i said.  'well why did you correct her on what they are called if you weren't planning on sending him to one?'  well you see sir, in the off chance that she ignored the fact that i asked her to not talk to our dad about his future care that she would at least call it by it's correct name and not make it sound like a loony bin!  seriously i just wanted to yell in their faces how ridiculous this whole case was!  my joy ride on the stand ended and then they called susan's friend to the stand.  this quack job claimed that she was in the car with susan when this conversation happened and that i was on speaker phone and she also heard that i adamantly stated that we were going to put him in an institution and that i berated susan for 30 minutes on the phone.  it got really good when kate and matt's lawyer said, 'well if what alyson said is true that would mean that you are committing perjury?', 'no!  alyson is the li...she is the one committing perjury!'  awesome.  i'm now a perjurer according to ms. quacky mcquackerson!  

the witnesses were done and the judge asked for closing statements.  the judge talked for a bit about the legality of his decision and then granted kate and matt temporary guardianship for the duration of the permanent guardianship trial.  wa.freaking.hoo!  he then called for an hour lunch and we would come back to go through the 8 motions.  we exited the courtroom last and noticed that the misfits were congregated at the bottom of the handicap ramp.  so due to the my dad's muscular dystrophy the handicap ramp is vital to him exiting a building.  also vital for two of my uncles that were there.  so we decided that someone would have to go ask them to move.  i volunteered.  char hesitated but i assured her that i would be 'nice'.  you know me.  i'm not one to take any crap from anyone, especially after being called a perjurer.  so i command the stairs in my black patent leather pumps and say 'excuse me, we need you to all clear the ramp so my dad and uncles can come down.'  silence.  not a one look at me.  yeah that wasn't going to work for me.  so i raise my voice, place my hand on my hip and say 'EXCUSE ME, you all need to get out of the way!'  they looked at me stunned and i heard 'well we're just trying to figure out rides.'  or my favorite was, 'you people are being ridiculous.'  from a man with what looked like a flat top.  'you people'...'you people'?  we are his kids you jackass!  you are some misfit who thinks that you are in the right by supporting a lady who is clearly unstable and kidnapped my dad!  i just looked at him, hand still on my hip and just nodded at him and said, 'okay, really?  okay.'  i was sort of a b(*&^ i will admit it.  well by that time the police officer who was eating an ice cream shake came out to push the misfits under a tree.  

it was pretty awesome!  we went to zupa's for lunch with my family.  i sat with my aunts whom i love dearly.  my aunt buffy posed the question of what are we supposed to be learning about this, why were we being put through this?  my aunt marci said what i couldn't...we are being put through this to realize how much we all love my dad.  he doesn't have to learn anything from this, it was for us to appreciate him and learn that we would do anything for him.  after lunch jake took my dad home cause he was getting restless and he didn't need to be there for the motions.  i honestly can only remember a few of the motions.  one was to reunite my dad and susan, that was denied.  one was to have visitations with my dad, that was denied.  one was to have a third neuro-psych evaluation from the dr. who helped diagnose him 4 years ago, that was granted.  but susan had to pay for it...ha ha!  another was to combine the annulment hearing with the permanent guardianship hearing so that we wouldn't have to drag this out any longer, that was granted.  and the last one i remember was to have my dad's 'lawyer' removed from the case and that was granted!  all the motions were basically in our favor which is a really good thing.  

we were there from 10-1 and then 2-5!  court is tiring and i have a whole new respect for judges!  we go back for the final hearing on thursday and will see who gets permanent guardianship...which i'm almost positive will be matt and kate.  they will also cancel the marriage that day when we win.  then we will be done with susan!  except when she pays all our expenses for this ridiculous mess.  i secretly hope this all end in a restraining order only because it will make for a better ending to my book!  

but seriously.  it will be so glad to have this all over and move on with our lives.  

the actual fun post

so...i may or may not have met someone.  and by may or may not i mean that i met someone.  

this is mike

he is a pretty great addition to my crazy little life!  a few weeks after landon so lamely dumped my via text message...mike emailed me.  i ignored him.  

me emailed me a second time. i ignored him.

he emailed me a third and final time claiming that his membership was 'going to expire' and he wanted to get to know me.  he left me his number.

now don't get me wrong, i wasn't uninterested in him, i was just scorned by landon.  i really didn't want to go out with anyone!  i decided to at least email mike back and left him my number informing him that i was old fashioned and he had to call/text me first.

the next morning he text me.  we talked via texting/telephone for about a week and agreed to go out that next wednesday.  

on monday he decided to come and get his haircut at my salon.  yes the first time we met was at my work.  not awkward at all.  he was all dressed to impress stating he just got back from a work meeting.  he was very charming and when he answered a phone call i made the decision that he was too schmoozy like for me.  too many bro's, man's, dude's and cool words were used in a 2 minute conversation.  we had plans to hang out that night after work and i was so unexcited.  i met him near his house, we dined and then hung out at his house and my schmoozy perception was confirmed.  oh well...except that i had already agreed to go out with him that wednesday.  lame.

wednesday rolled around and he decided to introduce me to his son.  oh yeah mike has a 12 year old son.  so i met his son...on our second date.  awesome!  we went to dinner (i got there too late to make the bee's game he had planned) and then took his son home.  his son thought i was hot.  only slightly awkward.  we went back to his place and just talked.  only a miraculously thing happened...he was a decent human being!  he put down his front and and he was just mike!  i walked away kicking myself because as much as i wanted to avoid it, i actually liked him!  so needless to say after that it was a done deal!  we have spent almost every single, solitary minute together that is humanly possible with our crazy schedules and lives.  just so you know i am currently talking to him on the phone as he drives to my house to hang out.  

i have officially turned into a girl and now swoon over every cute/cheesy thing that he says!  it's a little pathetic for sure.  he really is fantastic.  he makes me laugh everyday and we have so much fun together.  i am so glad to get to spend my time with him and can't wait to see what is in store for us!

he surprised me at work one day!

a beautiful sunday at the park.

yes he is really tan (he is 1/2 mexican, 1/2 spanish) and i am really white!

he has an adorable little smile!

we stay up way too late.

sunday dinner with friends.

just watching the nba play-offs.  yep i watch basketball now.

more basketball time together.  

he even met the family and they like him.  more importantly he likes my family!  nice work Asay's!

guess what?

i've made an executive decision to postpone the post of the actual court date to post fun things.  i know you are all dying to know what happened!  dun dun dun!  ha ha, you have to wait!  

so...

this is what you have missed!

a few dinners with this lovely...jessie ellen

did this little ones hair 

had a delicious lunch date with these two

more from the best primary chorister

me and eoz on mother's day

me and kate with her birthday presents from me and char

me and em

happy mother's day mom...stay classy

lots of family time

loving my millie girl

shopping in park city with my sisters

my 'loot' from our park city trip

had pho for the first time

did my mom's hair

ran...ran...ran...ran...ran...you get the idea

finally got a new windshield

blessing day for the boys

played with these cheese heads

little guys getting sooooo big

bath time with this darling

pretty hair

the wrinkliest bath feet ever

did a little hair

ate a little pre birthday cake...thanks jess love

here i am

i am alive and well everybody.  you can stop worrying!

where to start on filling ya'll in on my life...too many options!  i will break it down in a few posts so that you don't feel like you are reading forever...you're welcome!

so remember that time that i mentioned going to court...well that finally happened.  i was accused of perjury.  we had to fight off mobs of people from upsetting my dad since he couldn't really remember ANY of them.  i had to yell at a crowd of misfit adults to clear the handicap ramp so my dad and uncles could get out of the courthouse.  every motion was found in our favor and we got temporary guardianship for the duration of the permanent trial!  now i will tell you why we went to court.

my dad had this lady 'friend', we'll call her susan, who would drive from provo to farmington to take him so his single adult dances, take him to dinner and movies and parties to keep him 'active in his social circle'.  back in january susan talked to my sister katie to tell her that she wanted to marry my dad and that my dad loved her.  as ya'll may remember my dad has alzheimer's, unable to really have a romantic relationship of any sort.  he had told my brother matt multiple times that he didn't want to marry her and that he didn't love her.  on january 17 susan took my dad from his apartment that he shares with matt, and married him in the home of a judge that she was friends with.  matt received a phone call at midnight january 18 from an anonymous women to tell him that the marriage happened and that they were on a honeymoon and susan would contact us in a few days.  that night we called the police and were informed that she has done nothing legally wrong.  in utah as long as you are over the age of 16 and not marrying your cousin, anyone can get married!  that was a fun fact to find out in a time of crisis.

during that course of that week we learned lots of fun facts!  we found out that susan had done something like this before and that she wouldn't stop until she got every last dime out of us.  we found out that she already had her mom, who has dementia, living with her.  we found out that we had to hurry and get guardianship before she did so that we could get out dad back.  but i think the most interesting and hardest thing that we found out was that our dad was indeed worse and we needed to get him back no matter what.  

on january 20 matt and katie were granted temporary (30 days) guardianship of our dad!  they went to susan's home with a police escort who just happened to be katie's ex boyfriend from like 10 years ago.  it's a small world when you are in a crisis is something else we found out that week.  after a roller coaster evening in which my dad thought we were all conspiring to get his money and out to get him, trying to hit my brother in law and not wanting to talk to anyone but my brother in law and sister, they got my dad home and finally back to his old self.  the next day a man contacted katie telling her that he was retained as my dad's lawyer and that he wanted to meet with his client asap.  kate's lawyer later informed us that this man was in his 70's and has parkinson's disease...this should be fun!  

we had a court date set for february 13, 2012.  in the meantime kate and matt took dad to get a neuro/psych evaluation done.  the dr. was baffled by his age and the severity of the disease.  she concluded that dad was highly susceptible to exploitation and that there was really nothing to be done to stop the progress of the disease.  the friday before the scheduled court date, susan contested the neuro/psych evaluation stating that it was 'biased' since it was a dr. we found and that us taking him to the appointment changed the outcome.  okay.  or maybe he really does have alzheimer's and isn't capable of a lot of things.  she is crazy.  anyway.  this day we also found out that she had gone to the social security office and changed my dad's disability checks to go to her house...even though she didn't even have him living with her.  awesome, now we can add stealing to her ever growing list of wrong doings.  

we got another evaluation, froze the future disability checks and as for me, i had a nervous and emotional breakdown to my roommate, one of my oldest friends and my mom.  it was pretty awesome. we had another court date scheduled for february 28, 2012.  well you guessed it...she postponed that one too!  stating the that judge that was on our case did something unconstitutional.  seriously?  so we had to wait for a new judge to review the old judge to determine if he did in fact do something unconstitutional and then review the case!  this woman was quickly becoming the source of so much stress that i got shingles...yep just like an old person!  thanks susan.  

to be continued...